This started with a single love note I wrote after she and I went our separate ways. She and I are the only people in the world who will understand fully what everything I wrote down here and maybe no one will ever be here to read this page, but I will do my best to write one entry in here every day for the next 365 days, like in The Notebook, and hope that one day we can read them together and laugh at how foolishly passionate and convoluted we were at one point in time.
other entries:
www.xanga.com/asinglelovenote
"Please stay in my life. Please don't just completely shut me out. And know that everything I've done for you was real and was done with real feeling." These are her last words to me tonight, and I know, darling, I know you mean every word. I only wish I could do what you ask of me. I can't. This is me, the me you love, and I can't stop being me if you still love me. I still believe...that one day you will see and understand what I've said, I've done; one day you will know the truth about love, about us, about why time doesn't heal everything and about how time can't gauge something like love. You were the best thing to happen to me, regardless of how long it lasted, and I don't, refuse to believe it's over. When two souls recognize their counterpoints, they stay with each other, and create something beautiful. They create love in their unique definition.
Tonight, I realize how powerless I am, that I can't protect what I love most in this world from hurt and harm. I tried, baby, I tried, but fate is against me, against us. This is life, a fucked up taste of reality called life. One day, when we both realize the magnitude of what had taken place tonight, we will find out that life's ultimate antidote against happiness is regret.
I think it pains me the most to see you cry, knowing it won't be the last time you cry over me. The day you realize what you have lost tonight, you will cry because of me. And I can't be there to wipe your tears off your cheeks. That's what hurts the most. Time can make pain subside, but it can just as easily make it amplify. This is what we silently agreed to tonight for ourselves. Now it's just a matter of taking it like we deserve it.
Or maybe one day, when we are living out the life we know we would have together, we can laugh and giggle at how immaturely sappy and dramatic we were back in college. Good things happen to good people, and I will continue to be good for the sake of possibility, that one day you can rediscover me beneath the dusts of time and recognize this shaken but unbroken heart still pounding the same rhythm as it always had.
Our chains have never been broken.The bass clef necklace you gave me will be attached to the strings of my heart until the day I give you the treble clef necklace I got for you, and you will realize that OUR song has never ended - it just needed a cadence, a moment of rest.
Tonight, I uttered the words "I love you" and meant it. One day, even if not to me face to face, you will say the same for me. Until then, dear, forgive me for my cruelty, my necessary evil, and forget me. ~WS